The Emotionally Cornered

                On an unseasonably cold April day in New York City.  The city still had evidence of their snowstorm the day before from the wet streets and piled snow on the sidewalks.  A couple friends were hanging out at their favorite café.  Normally the crowd consists of five girls, and on Tuesdays, one guy.  The five girls are Alyssa, Vonnie, Gia, Janilsa, and Shruti. If there was one thing to be said about this group, it’s melting pot.  Every member (except Gia) can speak a different language and is fully one nationality.  They are Dominican, Russian, Dominican, and Pakistanian respectively.  On Tuesdays, which today is, their Greek male friend Larry shows up.  To add to the group today, two other males were there by the names of Boris and Victor (Russian and Dominican).  Boris, Vonnie, Alyssa, and Shruti all had Chemistry together and Victor was a friend of Janilsa’s.  Normally they would hang out at the café from 1:00 to 2:00 and then everyone but Larry went to class.  Sometimes they cut, and today was one of those days.  The odd thing about this day though was that Vonnie separated herself from the group and went outside to talk on the phone.  Vonnie Larry, and Alyssa had become extremely close in their time at school together.  At this time, Vonnie had been having trouble with her parents due to the reemergence of her ex-boyfriend Ben (muslim). 

                Ben had gone out with Vonnie for approximately eight months before breaking up in December.  It was a tough break up on both parts.  It actually happened twice.  The first time Ben dumped Vonnie, within a week they were back together but not too long afterward, Vonnie dumped Ben.  Ben became extremely upset over this and tried to maintain a friendship with Vonnie.  Vonnie vehemently refused and after many threats (which later proved hollow) by Ben, they didn’t contact each other.   That is, until now.  During the last four months Ben had gone to Toronto.  He did get Vonnie to give in and answer her phone a couple times but for the most part Vonnie and he didn’t speak.  Ben expertly manipulated Vonnie into slowly talking to him more and more by maintaining civil conversations.  Now that he was back in New York, it was time to move in.  Also during these three months, Vonnie changed her cell phone number, and refused for Ben to have the number.  Arguably this was the only mind game that Vonnie had over Ben, but one stronghold is not enough to deal with a master manipulator like Ben.  The conversation was taking place on Alyssa’s phone so that Ben would still not know Vonnie’s number.  It is unknown who called whom, but somehow Ben had to get Alyssa’s number.  The chemistry people ended up cutting class and Vonnie spent the time yelling and fighting with Ben outside dismissing anyone that tried to come near.  When she was done, her friends (now just Boris, Alyssa, and Larry) tried cheering her up and telling her how to deal with Ben.  With the fear that Vonnie had of her ex-boyfriend, it appeared only Vonnie could help Vonnie but her friends would never give up on her.  Larry knew the most about this because he had helped Vonnie through this four months ago, so he saw the same patterns of Ben threatening and Vonnie believing the threats that turned out hollow.  Once again, Vonnie was saying how nobody knows what she knows and what Ben is capable of.  When Vonnie talked about Ben and what he can do, it appears Satan, Allah, Yahweh, and God combined couldn’t overcome the massive power of Ben.  Vonnie, however, didn’t see how powerful she was making him.  Nobody is that powerful, the only power Ben had was the one power that Vonnie wouldn’t admit; the ability to stalk.  Vonnie seemed convinced that Ben would never harm her, but he would go after her friends and family instead.  Even with Janilsa’s brother being in a gang, one of Vonnie’s friends having two firehouses worth of firefighters, Boris with mob ties, and Larry’s family in Brooklyn also having gang connections, to Vonnie, Ben could overcome them all with his.  As long as Vonnie deified Ben and Ben was an evil, not a good, deity, things could only get worse. 

                After hanging out a bit, Boris and Alyssa went home and Larry, Gia, and Vonnie hung out around Greenwich Village.  Larry’s cell phone rang so he answered the phone and said, “Hello?”

                “Larry, it’s Kera, what’s good?”

                Kera was Larry’s cousin whom he used to be extremely close with.  They hadn’t talked much lately so this phone call came as a surprise.  Larry still looked at her like a little sister and wanted to protect her at all costs but Kera, who was the eldest in her family, did not like an older brother figure, which is why she pushed Larry away.  He responded, “Nothing, just hanging out with two of my friends.”

                “Really what friends?”

“Vonnie and Gia”

“Didn’t you hook up with one?”

“Yea”

“Which one Vonnie of Gia”

“The latter” (Larry didn’t want to say names on the phone especially with the topic matter)

“Alright cool, but I am heading to Greenwich Village now (Larry, Vonnie and Gia went to NYU) and I wanted to see if I could chill with you.”

                “Yea, That’s fine”

                So Kera came down to Greenwich Village to hang out with them.  What Kera didn’t realize was that somebody was listening to her conversation.  Ben and Kera both lived in Brooklyn.  He knew Larry’s name from Vonnie because in early January, Larry went over to Vonnie’s house and Ben showed up to yell at Vonnie for having a guy at her house when her parents weren’t there.  For this reason, Larry and Ben didn’t like each other and Ben erroneously thought Larry was trying to go out with Vonnie.  Given this, when he heard somebody utter an unusual name like that, he listened in and hearing the names “Vonnie” and “Gia” (Ben also had met Gia), he knew that these were exactly who he thought they were.  He immediately began following Kera.  Unfortunately for Ben, Kera has a sixth sense of knowing when someone is following her.  This scared her so she called up one of her male friends and told him she was coming over.  Whether Ben realized Kera knew or just thought she was going to the kid’s house, he opted not to follow her and make his own trip to Greenwich Village.  Kera noticed he wasn’t following as soon as she made the phone call, so she explained to the kid what had happened and where she was going.  Her friend didn’t mind the interruption.  Kera then walked toward the subway and Ben decided to wait a little before heading down.

                Kera arrived at Greenwich Village and met up with Larry, Vonnie, and Gia.  As they were walking, Vonnie was talking to Gia and Larry was listening.  Kera walked ahead not interested in the conversation.  As they were crossing a street, a car ran a red light, Larry saw the car heading toward Kera and froze and watched in slow motion as the car skid on the wet ground and hit Kera as she fell onto the hood and rolled off finally landing on her back.  Larry ran to her and immediately checked her vital signs while the car drove off.  She was not breathing nor had a pulse.  Larry yelled for them to call the police and immediately started CPR.  The ambulance came quickly and took over for Larry as he sat on the curb with his head in his hands not believing what had happened.  To Larry, he knew he was in striking distance to push Kera out of the way but he froze and it was too late before he regained his senses.  To Larry, feeling that he betrayed a friend was the worst feeling in the world.  The ambulance asked Larry to go but he shrugged them off.  It hurt to look at Kera, knowing that it should have been him being put into the ambulance.  Vonnie and Gia were shocked that Larry didn’t go with her and only gave them her name and number of her parents.  Larry turned his back to the street and reached at his waist and pulled out two pocketknives he carries around with him.  He turned the blades so that they faced his chest and held them there.  Gia saw this and immediately came over to Larry and said, “Larry, what the fuck are you doing?”

                “Leave me alone”

                “No, give me the knives, you don’t know what you’re doing.” She said she as grabbed Larry’s arms. 

                Larry jumped up pulling his arms free and then gripping Gia’s biceps with only his fingers as his palms still maintained a grip on his knives.  He yelled in a deafening tone, while shaking Gia “Shut the fuck up! I’m not giving you the fucking knives, they’re mine, I can do whatever the fuck I want with them, stop fucking getting involved where you’re not wanted, you always fucking do this.  What the fuck do you care if I kill myself?”

                As Larry continued berating Gia, Gia cried since she was scared for a variety of reasons.  One she couldn’t get free, two, Larry was yelling in decibels loud enough to be heard in midtown, three he had knives in the very hands he gripped and shook her with; an accident could easily happen.  The most popular reason for crying is when one feels helpless.  Vonnie saw what was going on and grabbed Larry’s arm and pulled him.  Larry turned to face her with the knives still exposed and facing him.  Vonnie said, “Try that on someone that can take it, you know Gia can’t, try that shit with me.”

                Some would say, Vonnie was being coldhearted given the circumstances but she knew this was how to deal with Larry right now.  He was letting out all his stress and frustration on Gia and Gia was too sensitive for that type of thing.  Vonnie also knew not to try to take the knives but just to try to convince him to put it away.  Vonnie said, “Why aren’t you shaking me?”

                “Vonnie, you’re different, you don’t treat me like I’m a child, just leave me alone”

                “Why, so you can pull knives on yourself and threaten to kill yourself?”

                “Vonnie, just turn around”

                “Why?”

                “Please”

                “Why?”

                “You don’t want to see what I’m going to do”

                “You’re not killing yourself”

                “Okay, just turn around”

                “What are you going to do that you don’t want me to see?”

                “I just can’t kill myself with you watching, I can’t give you the horror of looking me in the eye as I die.”

                “Well if you’re serious, I’m staying here”

                While they were talking, Gia got in a cab to go home; she didn’t want to see Larry anymore.  Larry said as he unbuttoned his jacket and stared at a figure in the distance, “Alright, I’ll turn around”

                Due to Larry being very skinny, he could easily locate his ribs.  He felt his ribs and twisted the knife so that it was at it’s widest and stuck it between his ribs into his heart.  He fell forward to provide more force since it takes a tremendous amount to reach your heart.  Vonnie was shocked; she leaned over and wrapped her arms around Larry.  Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulder and a familiar voice said, “hmmm looks like you’re little boyfriend killed himself.”

                Vonnie froze for she knew that voice.  The voice of someone she had loved, someone that could get in her head the most, someone she feared, someone that triggered so many emotions she could barely stand in his presence.  The person helped her to her feet and turned her so she could lock eyes with her manipulator.  Sure enough, it was Ben; he had found them Ben asked Vonnie, “Guess you can’t fuck him anymore.”

                Vonnie backed up and felt a brick wall, thus she was cornered.  Ben said, “What’s a matter Vonnie?  Where’s the girl that was yelling at me earlier?  You’re all alone now, your only hope, not that he was much of one anyway, just stabbed himself.  Since you’re all alone, we’re going to talk and you’re not going to give me your fucking shit.”

                Vonnie was stunned, but she felt the instinctual courage animals get when cornered and said, “How can you be so cold? I just saw one of my friends kill himself, and you’re still keeping up this mind game?”

                “Oh it’s my fault, you didn’t talk to me for four months so you could fuck this skinny shit, what about my feelings?  What about how you fucked me up?  Does anyone care about me?”  He said as he got even closer. 

                Vonnie lowered herself on the wall from fear and could only manage a faint, “I never fucked Larry, we were just friends”

                Ben grabbed Vonnie and pushed her against the wall and snapped, “Don’t lie to me!”

                It was official, Vonnie was trapped, cornered, helpless, humans are animals too, they have instincts, and cornered animals snap back because they have to or die.  Vonnie snapped back “Don’t touch me!” as she pushed him back.

                Ben nodded and moved closer so he was inches from her face and said, “Try that again see what happens.”

                Once again, Vonnie felt trapped so she abandoned reason and just went to instinct and shoved Ben back again and what happened next seemed like slow motion to her, but her body had performed it automatically, her hand came to the side and swung across Ben’s face.  That was the first time she had slapped somebody, and it felt good.  She let adrenaline take over and punched Ben in the nose.  Ben snapped back with a jab but Vonnie saw it coming and twisted her limber body to the side and Ben’s hand whizzed by Vonnie’s head into the brick.  Ben retreated bent over holding his fist in dire pain.  Vonnie walked perpendicular to Ben and ran full speed and jammed her knee into the side of his head knocking him down.  She then stomped at his back repeatedly, all that was in her head was all the things Ben said to get into her head, the way he made her feel after a phone conversation, the way he manipulated her, the way he played whatever game he wanted and forced her to play and, most recently, the way she mocked the suicide of one of her best friends.  Ben rolled out of the way and to his feet.  Vonnie was smart and isolated her stomps to the back of the head and neck.  Ben got up with blood oozing down his face.  He looked at Vonnie with intense hatred in his eyes.  How could you hate someone that you claimed you loved?  The biggest thing that bothered Ben was that his ego was being put in check; he was getting beat up by a girl half his size in the streets of New York with many witnesses.  He ran at Vonnie, not thinking how to fight, but Vonnie, gained back only enough rational to realize the mistake, she sidestepped Ben and stuck her foot out tripping Ben to the ground and having his face slide against the pavement tearing at his skin even more.  Ben stumbled to his feet.  Vonnie darted forward and jumped on Ben’s back.  Unfortunately, Vonnie didn’t weigh much and since Ben was stocky and well proportioned, he could support her weight despite his loss of blood.  He backed Vonnie into the wall again and leaned into it sandwiching Vonnie.  He then eased up and turned and grabbed Vonnie by the biceps and pushed her against the wall.  He asked in a taunting manner, “Now Vonnie, did you really think you could beat me?  I’m from Brooklyn.”

                Vonnie kicked him in the shin and then delivered the second slap of her life across his face.  She said, “So am I”

                Truth is both were originally from Brooklyn but moved to Fort Lee, NJ and had lived there most their lives.  Vonnie twisted her hips and swung back with her fist punching Ben in the nose knocking him back a few feet.  Ben was blinded from the blood on his face and shock that he was actually losing.  Vonnie ran at Ben jumped to the side and drilled her knee into his solar plexus causing him to drop to one knee.  Once again she saw this as an opportunity to get a running start and knee him in the back of the head collapsing him to the ground and then stomp at his head and neck repeatedly.  Ben quickly turned around trying to roll away as he did before but he caught a foot directly in the face and stopped.  Vonnie stomped repeatedly as Ben got too weak to resist.  Vonnie started stomping at his midsection as well.  Vonnie was pre-med so knew the soft spots of the body like the solar plexus and center of the forehead.  When she tired and Ben was barely conscious she put her right leg on Ben’s neck and said, “All it takes is for me to put pressure, and you die, you’re hyoid bone breaks and no more Ben, bet you didn’t think your life would be in my hands.  You should know how fucking pissed I am right now, if I would be able to beat you.  So you better start fucking begging.”

                Ben panted for breath and between gasps said, “Please Vonnie, don’t kill me.”

                “I forget, who fucked with who?” Vonnie asked.

                “I tried to play with your mind, I played mind games, I thought it was fun to break someone as strong as you, I’m sorry.”

                “Did I intentionally hurt you?”

                “No, I just said that so you’d feel like shit and start talking to me so I could play my sick game again.”

                “Did I fuck other guys these past four months?”

                “No, I just wanted to get a rise out of you, I hated anyone that hung out with you because I was insanely jealous.” 

                “Will you call me again, or will you finally believe me that we need time apart to get over each other.”

                “We’ll pretend we never knew each other Vonnie, and go our own separate ways just please don’t kill me, you love me”

                “I don’t love you Ben, You can’t love someone you’re afraid of.  But I’m not afraid of you now, tables have turned, you’re life is in my hands now; I can take it.  With the way you talk about Larry, maybe I should.  The way you don’t trust me, the way you harass me and fucking stalk me, will you stop stalking me?”

                “Yes, no more, I won’t stalk you, you win, come on Vonnie, Please don’t kill me, I’m begging you.”

                “I know, but I begged you to stop calling and stop playing your games, and stop your threats and you kept at it for you sick ego.”

                “What do you want from me? I told you I’d stop.”

                “Do you still think I’m a liar?”

                “No, you don’t lie, I lied to get in your head”

                “Will you threaten me or my friends?”

                “No, you win, I surrender, and you’re free of me”

                “That’s what I like to hear” she said as she looked away, “But Ben”

                “What?”

                Vonnie leaned in putting slight pressure on her foot, “You lie Ben, and let me tell you something and do something you could never do…..make a threat and then carry through……I’m going to fucking kill you, close your eyes”

Ben snapped out of it, “You don’t have the guts”

“Like me and you said, Ben… I don’t lie” She said as she lifted the leg not on Ben’s neck so her full body weight rested on the only bone not connected to another for support and turned her head away.  A pop of the bone was all it took and Ben’s eyes glazed over in death. 

                The sound of the popping bone was surprisingly refreshing for Vonnie.  No more Ben, she had successfully ridded herself of the one person that could hurt her the most.  She finally snapped back into reality and checked on Larry.  Larry was still semi-conscious.  He ran his hand in Vonnie’s hair and said, “I’m so proud of you Vonnie, Please don’t cry for me, I got to watch you beat the shit out of Ben and kill him.  You’re free now; I don’t fear death because I will see Drew again (Drew was Larry’s best friend that had died 3/21/02).  Thank you for giving me the best sight before I die.  Don’t feel bad for me Vonnie; I’m in a better place.  I had to do this, I had betrayed a close friend again, with my stabbing myself, I gave you the strength to face Ben.  See I know him better than you think, I knew he wouldn’t sympathize with me, and you’re like me, it’s much worse when someone does something to your friends than to you.  That was your biggest fear, but now you faced it and Ben can’t hurt you or your friends.  The easy way is to hit a button on a phone and if he continued to stalk you file a restraining order against him so next time he gets within 100ft. of you, he’ll be in jail.  That’s not your style though Vonnie, you had to do it the hard way, so you met him in the streets, took the right motivation and executed beautifully.  I love you Vonnie, and I’m proud of you.  Don’t think to mourn my death, I’m dying in my favorite city and I died seeing you free yourself form Ben’s chains.  I don’t know if stabbing myself gave you the extra impetus, but I like to think it did.  Just tell Kera I love her and that it’s not her fault.  Don’t call an ambulance, let me die, I don’t want to live because life can only go downhill from this moment.”

                Vonnie cried but she knew Larry was sincere.  She just said, “Thank you Larry”

                Vonnie didn’t know what gave her the strength to do what she did.  Was it what Ben said about Larry’s stabbing himself? Was it that she was cornered and had no choice? Was it she just got fed up with the stalking and everything?  Was it a combination? Whatever it was, she was glad she did it.  Witnesses all testified that Vonnie was fighting in self-defense.  Even though, from a legal standpoint, she had taken it too far, nobody pressed charges because every witness aided Vonnie.  Larry was buried in New York since everyone that knew him knew that’s what he would have wanted.  Kera ended up only spending a day in the hospital and blamed herself at first for Larry’s death but Vonnie consoled her and told her what he had said.  Vonnie, Alyssa, Gia, Boris, Janilsa, and Shruti remained very close friends and were happy they never had to deal with Ben’s bullshit again.